I’m glad he’s having a good vacation.  Believe me!  There is nothing like a good Hawaiian vacation to calm your nerves and refresh your whole being.  I don’t know if it’s the number of ions in the air or the fact that you are surrounded by the immense colors blue and green, but Hawaii is and has always been my vacation destination.  In fact I am longing for it now and when I see Obama and his family enjoying all things the islands have to offer: sun, sand, waves, beach, great food, interesting and friendly people, music, hula, laughter, quiet reflection. flowers, casual dress and manner…. the list is endless.  It just makes me want it more and more.

Alan Wong’s is my hands down favorite restaurant and chef.  I have eaten there many many times.  On one ten day vacation my husband and I actually ate there five different nights.  Alan came out of the kitchen to check on us himself and serve the chef’s choice dessert plate which consisted of five tastes!  To hear that Obama is enjoying the care and attention of my favorite chef makes me tear up, not with envy, but with gratitude.

Seeing the love and tenderness he shows for his girls as he cuddles them close, walks with them near the surf, putting a flower behind Sasha’s ear… I also hope he is getting time to read a novel or two and have some romantic time with Michelle.  The sound of the surf, the moonlight on a balmy night, the curtains blowing in the fragrant air… It’s time to make love, Mr President.  And I don’t think we’re going to have to worry about Barack getting caught with an intern or any other woman for that matter.

I wish you a million moons over Hawaii.
Aloha.

What I would say about Stanley Ann Dunham, Barack Obama’s mother, is the same thing I would say about myself and countless other women who were on the forefront of the sexual and cultural revolution during the sixties and seventies.  Ann got there before many of us, but her sisters followed in her path sleeping with men of different colors and cultures, marching for civil rights, donating our time and voices to down trodden peoples all over the world, burning our bras along side the shadows of our brothers who burned their draft cards, marching for peace, standing up to the old tired establishment of old white men who were too much in line with the military industrial complex.

We wrote poetry, wove macrame, read Khalil Gibran, made love to whomever we chose, had children with whoever happened to be there at the time with or without the benefit of marriage.  We named our children Barack, Marshada, Keif, Nadanche, Moleek, Serena, Raven, and Rainbow.  We had natural childbirth many at home, breast fed our babies, refused to  circumsize our sons and taught our daughters that they had choices.

We  volunteered at child care centers, worked in community gardens, recycled, befriended the elderly, sang folk songs in coffee houses, and listened to jazz late in the night.  We organized food co-ops, defended the rights of animals, and became vegetarians.

We loved our children, continued our educations, became doctors, teachers, anthropologists, librarians and social workers.  We championed gay and lesbian rights, and found happiness in our natural surroundings.  We were a movement - the baby boomer women.  There are millions of us.  We did things differently.  We talked back.  We questioned authority.

Barack Obama is one of our children.  I think of Ann Dunham as a warrior.  I wish I could have met her.
I know I would have liked her.  I love her son.

I’m voting for him in November.  When he is elected I am going to hang a framed portrait of him in my living room…. Just like family.

I’M BACK!!!
I had a great gig last Wednesday night playing for the Bears - big
hairy men - only gay.
I made some money too.
Wow!
They love me! They really, really love me!

My opening joke to the packed room full of big 250 pounders in tank
tops and shorts was that I had died and gone to heaven. They called
back, “Yeh, that’s the way we feel too!”
“Yeah! Wild Jane!” someone yelled from the back. “We love Wild Jane!”

Opening songs: “I Could Write a Book”, “Lover Man”
My fantasy has always been Goldilocks and the Three Bears. This
one’s too hard, this one’s too soft, this one is just right! Hmmm -
yummy! One guy in the audience called out that his fantasy was just
“Three Bears.”

Of course, in rating Bears no one could be under a seven… more
like an eight…. but you know the saying …size isn’t everything!
HA! ha ha

You know I was in my element when I belted out “Standing on the
Corner”. They all joined in “watching all the guys, watching all the
guys, watching all they guys….. go “bi” (Don’t I wish?…. another
joke by/bye/bi)

I also did “Love for Sale”, “All that Jazz”, “Body and Soul”, “Round
Midnight” and at least 20 other standards, blues, and ballads. I had
a ball! There’s just so much MUST - testosterone- in the air when those guys
are here. Town was packed.

I love watching Bears eat! They don’t priss around with a little
nibble of bread slightly dipped in olive oil lightly dripped on a
plate. They take the whole stick of bread and pour the olive oil
straight onto the bread before they take a big bite. Ha, ha, ha

I’ve been with the same man for thirty years, (Everybody say, “Hi
Dave”. Hi Dave, the crowd responds looking hungirrrrly at Dave) … The same man
for thirty years, but I have a rich fantasy life. In fact, when you
guys come to town, it’s enough fodder to keep my marriage going for
another full year! Ha, ha, ha

“So, where are you guys headed now? Oh, the Bonfire at the Outback?
I’ve heard what goes on there! Behind every tree, there’s a Bear
just waiting for you! That’s gonna be my fantasy tonight when I get
home!”

Many of the guys remembered me from my restaurant. They like a big,
pink, hairless … dirty mama bear like me! And they can tell that I
love them too! Oh yeah, and I also looked beautiful!

Love WIld!
Janie

In their tribute to Diana Ross only Melinda was truly great tonight. Everyone else was just OK. I am really a fan of Chris Sligh and Blake, but both of them just didn’t go the extra mile. Phil did a good job and LaKisha was satisfactory. Here are my latest stats:

1. Melinda - WOW! I’m crying too… Fantastic!
2. Phil - The answer is, “Yes!” Solid performance!
3. Blake - YOU EXCITE ME! But I wanted more… Where was the scat and beatbox. I missed it.
4. Lakisha - That song has been covered magnificently by the best singers. Hard to match them.
5. Chris R - Could be a contender. Needs commitment.
6. Stephanie - Pitch was a problem. Use your head voice instead of screaming.
7. Gina - Drop it down a couple of notes. Harsh tone. No screaming please.
8. Chris Sligh - Smooth vocal. Where are your glasses? I missed them. Bring it!
9. Haley - You are a beauty! Beginning too soft. Stand up.
10. Jordin - Wrong song choice. Didn’t do it for me.
11. Brandon - Halting start. Forgot lyrics.
12. Sanjaya - Weak voice. Strange hair and earrings. Odd appearance. Who are you trying to be?

BLEEP, etc
Mar 10, 2007 | 2:33 PM PST
Category: Wildjane Speaks
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Is BLEEP plus the Tweeny Block vote for Sanjaya plugging up the phone lines? The producers of AI should take a look at these two issues to see how it is affecting the outcome of the contest.

Even the judges were astounded at the outcome for the Final Twelve. I feel sorry for Sanjaya at this point because he knows he is out of his league. I’m afraid the poor little guy is going to have a nervous breakdown.

I was unable to vote on the men’s nights for the past two weeks because of busy phone lines. Maybe we could vote on line instead to keep the ballots fair? I am disappointed that I was unable to vote for my favorite guy.

I believe the processs of AI brings a lot of unknown talent to the forefront. It also produces some people of lesser talent who become successful. We have plenty of those people around the business anyway. Talent is no guarantee of success.

I want the best people to win, not the weakest.

BOYZ GO HOME! GIRLZ ARE BACK!
Mar 8, 2007 | 5:28 PM PST
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I wish we could keep all the Girlz and just a couple of the Boyz because this is where the talent is this season. I was bored to death on Tuesday, but Wednesday woke me up! I predict that whoever is left of the Boyz will be knocked off one by one until only the Girlz are left.

Wildjane’s Handicap:
1. Gina - Hot and Sexy! Rock On! I LOVE your hard edge!
2. LaKisha - You do it to me EVERY SINGLE TIME!
3. Melinda - Can’t count her out. She IS THE PERFECT W-O-M-A-N!
4. Jordin - Beauty and energy, but why this song? Hmmm?
5. Stephanie - Oh dear, voice is off tonight sadly.
6. Sabrina - Please TONE IT DOWN. Screaming doesn’t sound pretty.
7. Haley - You are so cute. I hate to see you go. Too bad you didn’t try out for Grease.
8. Antonella - Better than usual, but take a ticket and go to the end of the line.

PS I love Ryan Seacrest! I am a BIG GIRL and he is just a little guy.

WHAT A BUST!!!
Mar 8, 2007 | 11:39 PM PST
Category: Wildjane’s Handicap
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OMG!! I just can’t believe the outcome of tonight’s voting!

Jared - You’re so sweet, melt in my mouth like chocolate.
Antonella - There’s a place for you in this business. Don’t give up! Follow your dreams!
Sabrina - I’ve been saying it all along. BE REAL! Great performance tonight!
Sundance - You are a GREAT front man! Someone will pick you up. OMG! I can’t believe I cried.

Note: Carrie Underwood needs a class in microphone technique.

My TOP FIVE:
LAKISHA
BLAKE
CHRIS SLIGH
MELINDA
GINA

I love Jordin, Phil, Brandon, and Haley.
The rest of you will be going HOME SOON…
Sanjaya doesn’t belong there at all and he knows it.
Stephanie and Chris R will be cut soon.

I am sad and frustrated about tonight’s show.

Don’t Break My Heart - Boyz
Mar 7, 2007 | 1:35 PM PST
Category: Wildjane’s Handicap
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Don’t Break My heart, Boyz. All I’m hearing is pap from most of you. Blah. Blah. Blah. I’m almost bored. Yes, you can all sing a good song, but only two or three of you are taking any risks and that’s what it takes to win this. I hear and see a lack of commitment across the board. Please STEP UP!!!

Wildjane’s Handicap:
1. Blake - I WANT MORE!!! More scat, more beatbox. I know you have it in you…
2. Chris Sligh - I dig the soul patch. STRONG CONTENDER!
3. Jared - OOH! YOU ARE SWEET! Style, beauty, and BOOTY!!!
4. Sundance - Huh? Nice rock growl.
5. Chris R. - Nice depth. Nice range. Just nice.
6. Brandon - Nothing wrong with it.
7. Phil - I don’t wanna see you go because I am the proud mother of a SAILOR!
8. Sanjaya - I really hope I don’t have to type your name again. Come OUT!

I just want to say that I LOVE RYAN SEACREST!

I AM SOOO DISSED
Mar 2, 2007 | 1:59 PM PST
Category: Wildjane Speaks
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I restate my opinion of the American public. …Look who we have for president! People have to get on the phone and vote for who they like. Right now this contest is being run by millions of teenage girls who seem to like the simpiness of Sanjaya and Antonella vesus the true talent of Leslie and AJ.

I know the drill: redial, redial, redial. People like my mom (who watches the show faithfully and is 77 years old) vote once for their favorite and that’s it. The teen set votes and re-votes many, many times. Hence, the outcome. That’s why Carrie Underwood won.

My faves are still in the race, but I hope AJ and Leslie will continue on their musical quests. They have to remember that they were chosen by the judges for having potential. Work it. Love you.

Da Boyz Week Two
Feb 28, 2007 | 4:06 PM PST
Category: Wildjane’s Handicap
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The Boyz came back tonight with their best game - A great improvement over last week!
Wildjane’s handicap:

1. Blake - My number one! Scat and beatbox together excites me! Yeah baby!
2. Phil - Brought it. Nice start. Go NAVY!
3. Jared - Let’s Get It ON! …and I mean it…Take me to the love boat, Honey!
4. Chris S - Saved by a Woman. I love you… for real.
5. AJ - Nice and mellow. New Dawn. New Day. I hope you stay.
6. Chris R - Nice and upbeat. I’m starting to feel you.
7. Sundance - You played it safe. Great energy, but too easy… especially the lyrics. Ho-hum.
8. Brandon - You are so beautiful, but this performance was trite and mundane.
9. Nick - I love your smokey voice, but I didn’t get the fever. (See note below)*
10. Sanjaya - You should have gone home last week and you know it. (Ditto)*

*Note; If you can’t make the song work, why not wear an Elizabethan costume like tights and a big floppy hat…oh yeah…and a cod piece.